I said I would explain my stance on the paranormal in my "My Story" post, but I didn't do it. If you look carefully, I skirted round the diagnosis and my experience of my condition, managing to hedge together the suggestion that I am experiencing 'spiritual disturbance' as well as suggesting that I acknowledge experiencing plain schizophrenic symptoms.
This weblog is a little controversial. It's not per se about coping with schizophrenia, or discussing symptoms according to the conventional medical model. This is the kind of blog, if you are a patient diagnosed with schizophrenia, that your therapist might ask you to ignore. Well what is the therapist ignoring? The spiritual realm, and all beliefs about communication with it, whether desired or undesirable communication.
And here's the medical definition of my experience that I choose: that, since a spiritual awakening, I have been open to both desirable and undesirable spiritual phenomena. Cannabis, used by Indian sadhus to open them up to Divine union, opened up my subtle spiritual senses (the psychic senses, if you will, the sixth sense) as well as deranging many of my mental faculties (causing me hallucinations and delusions).
"There are only five senses" says the doc. And no deity probably either. Not only is the rational world of Western medical science sceptical (or over-sceptical?), its position on psychicness is without proof - there is no scientific knowledge of the parts of the brain that are able to receive and transmit information in and of itself (not through the portals of doc's acknowledged five senses). It is my belief that the more refined awareness of future scientific instrumentation will certainly be able to detect the parts of the brain responsible for clairaudience, clairvoyance, telepathy and so on.
One of the reasons that what I call subtle spiritual sensitivity is a question of controversy is simply that in some people these abilities are awake (and to varying degrees) and in others they are not awake at all. Their brains have these faculties within them, but they are more or less dormant. These faculties tend to be awakened through formal spiritual practices and come into themselves on the spiritual path as a means of accessing the essence of reality and knowing 'God'.
So how can I prove that I am having 'paranormal' experiences? Usually I do not question the interpretation I hold of my day-to-day experience. Quite rarely, I wonder, is the doctor right? And begin to imagine that all manner of spirits, ghost and demons are not real. But then, what happens when we die? If there is a Heaven, we become spirits to know it. And then, also, what of God? A spiritual belief here: that the Deity hides Itself in this our dense physical realm so that It may be found. Do we disbelieve in what is hidden? Are there any willingly agnostic psychiatrists at least? This is not an area lending easily to proofs, being itself an extra-sensory realm, where our scientific instruments are at present only those people sensitive to the extra-sensory...
Sometimes a random word may come into my head, spoken, that I usually never think of, and this is a kind of half-proof of telepathy. Or, more convincingly, yet rare, a 'heard' thought. In a difficult passage of Life, my brother was experiencing mental stress. I 'heard' him think "Who am I?" as he searched for meaning. I asked him later that evening if he had thought this. his answer: yes, he had thought that earlier that evening. For me, it is unusual to have a proof like this. Recently I have spiritually heard predictions of events later in my Life, which I have no reason to distrust, and which came from spirits. Although the Future is normally not certain in all its details, in my belief, I trust that these predicitons will very likely come true.
Usually my paranormal experience extends to hearing spirits from Heaven who gather around me in support of me on my Life Journey - helpful people from Beyond. Also gathered around me, in ways I have not yet been able to shift, and presumably attracted by my sensitivity are beings I take to be unascended people who have died - ghosts. And - and this is the main problem, greater than a loss of privacy from ghostly surveillance and all that means - I also come into daily contact with beings who are able to change my thoughts and thus cause me injury out of malice and for their own reasons. Simply put, these latter beings are people who have died, and although not remaining on Earth like ghosts, they have not ascended fully to Heaven; they feel discontent and direct this at people living on Earth - and they can be called demons.
In my long search for meaning, uncorroborated by those in authority seeking to help me, I found this helpful page on the Internet: http://www.near-death.com/experiences/research14.html . I don't exactly buy all of the information on this page, but I was reassured / healed by what Arthur Yensen says under the title "Negativity must be removed to enter Heaven", and what David Oakford says underneath the title "NDE examples of the Earthbound realm." I'm asking you to believe in the testimony of those who have died and gone to Heaven and come back with accounts of it, through not dying well enough! I think those people and I, and those like me, are related; we all argue for the reality of the spiritual. I have read that spiritual disturbances on Earth occur on one level to remind us that yes, there is a spiritual aspect to Reality, and this kind of thing occurs to some people to spread awareness of the spiritual.
For me, all manner of positivity helps defend me, but I have as yet been unable to get rid of the attention of the beings bothering me. The transaction between us is like a game of to-ing and fro-ing in which I am injured and then I strengthen myself with affirmations or prayers. On the religious front, I have often wondered why God does not stop what happens, since it is more within Divine jursidiction. "Well, because it's not real, it's an illness!" you might say. Or because it's my own manifestation and I must learn to overcome it myself. God permits far worse things than spiritual oppression.
So, from schizophrenia to spiritual oppression in one easy move! There's the long and the short of my beliefs. I'm not raving about 'demons', I'm giving a rational account of beings that may be called demons because of their malicious behaviour, who are in actual fact little more than deceased people in part-ascension to Heaven who have profound emotional issues to be healed.
If anyone out there is experiencing something similar, think about this for comfort: Life is change, and change must surely come to the situation you wish were different. For me, I have recently come to realise that I 'hold many strong cards' in this game. I am in a dimension I can control, and by my choices bring about great happiness for myself. Those spirits in a kind of limbo merely have their minds as assets, which they mistakenly use against other beings; they cannot seek fruition any other way, except to ascend to the Light.
Two years ago I saw a healer who follows the ancient shamanic tradition. I began to explain my situation, and I was pleased, and remain pleased, that he believed me. He believed my account of spiritual disturbance, as opposed to being purely and totally a schizophrenic condition. I saw him again recently for a healing session, and when I enquired afterwards as to what he had found, he said that there were signs of interference to my solar plexus and crown chakras. (The chakras are subtle energy centres that extend from the body for the purpose of integrating universal energies to sustain us in physical form; the chakras, as part of the aura, are visible to those with high clairvoyant awareness.)
So, dear reader, are you willing to stand before the entirety of human history and discount testimonies of hauntings of every kind, all accounts of extra-sensory spiritual phenomena, the commandments of Jesus Christ to all his followers to cast out devils, are you willing to disbelieve in the existence of the soul, and every human tradition that uses protective methods to ward off evil and curses?
I believe that people can have these paranormal psychic experiences, of clairaudience and clairvoyance and so on, and I believe in Spiritual Life in all its facets. Isn't it possible that a person can be both psychic and psychotic?
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